For some reason Nokia is also shipping the phones with beta-quality firmware – there’s a world of difference between the phone’s stability and operating speed in firmware versions 10 and 11. The phones in the stores probably are running v10 which from marketing standpoint is just insane.

Every time I’ve approached N95 in a local cell phone store or a phone dealer, it’s been locked. Not “locked” security-wise, but due to software bugs or whatever. It seems that there’s an “evil gang of baggypant youngsters walking around, locking up all the N95s with seemingly random key presses”, according to a salesman from Verkkokauppa . :-D

At Stockmann, a shop geezer told me “they’ve put in a security program” just to keep people from “doing harm”, i.e., testing a product. I finally got my hands on one (they took the battery off and back on just to “halt the program”, yeah right), used it for a short while, slided the cover back and forth, opened two or three applications – and it froze (not due network operations without a SIM card). Obviously, I was mistaken as a baggypant youngster by the “security program” :-D

Personally, I really, really considered getting an N95 but gave up due to the fact it was practically impossible to test it due to aforementioned aspects – and that most of the phone retailers are fucking 3rd class 2nd-hand-car-salesmen-wannabes. So, in theory, I was positively surprised about the N95 as well: I saved a heck a lotta money not buying it. A friend of mine got it and true, it’s been working surprisingly well. Until I found out he had been using it only for talking and sending SMSs.

So I’ll stick to my N80 until Apple Phone arrives. It may easily be Apple’s shittiest pile of crap, but even if it were so, it still would be miles ahead Nokia’s best product. I can say this proud and loud because I’ve been using both brands for a REALLY long time. I’ve had 18 phones now, 12 of them were made by Nokia. 10 of those 12 were somewhat unfinished products. The two winners? 8210 and 8250, about 6 years ago.

Just to be fair: Nokia’s so-called Smart Phones aren’t the worst in the world. Which phone would have the 2007 Phone Raspberry Award? Any ideas? (Nevertheless, Niko’s N90 is/was quite high in the ranks, I’d say…) :-D Nothing – and I mean NOTHING – has ever needed that much deep understanding, acceptance and patience.

Using a Smart Phone reminds me of – not making love to a beautiful woman, but living in a remote location, being forced to have sex with a prostitute (’cause there’s no-one else within 1000 miles and you’re going crazy), only to find day after day she’s actually got a pair of balls, dodgy boobjob, slight beard growth here and there, stinky breath, a crab family and a healthy dose of HepC. And still you need the services provided by (s)he/it because you need to connect. With people.

At least you didn’t buy the Sirocco.